Kepa Aloha: HAPPINESS & LONELINESS: A Choice between two States of Being

Ciao a tutti,

Mahalo for coming back to check out Kepa Aloha! I am extremely grateful for all your support!

If you didn't get a chance to read my last post about the 8 things I experienced in my first month in Italy, go check um out here!

I have no recent updates about my life in Italy at the moment. The only thing that's really preoccupying my mind is an inner conflict. The components? HAPPINESS and LONELINESS.

Now before I go on, you all should know that I am not the kind of person who will use any form of social media, including this blog, to air-out my dirty emotional laundry for the whole world to see. That ain't cute.

However, I do hope that what I have to share with you today - my awesome family, friends, and teachers - is worth your time and attention. This blog explores the choice we have between two states of being.

Happiness vs. Loneliness. Which one will YOU choose?

No one said this journey would be easy...

Study on Happiness

The other day I found this TED talk by Robert Waldinger entitled, What Makes A Good Life? Lessons from the Longest Study on Happiness. It shows the results of a 75-year-old study about what it takes to live a long, healthy, and happy life. Apparently it all comes down to just one, simple thing.

Watch the video to find out before reading on!

...

So there you have it. Happiness is directly related to GOOD RELATIONSHIPS.

Grateful to have a good relationsihp wit my craazzy family <3

The Reality of Loneliness in my Post-high school Life

As the video stated, LONELINESS is the antithesis of your Happiness, and yes, it is not always easy to combat. It's even harder if you're like me and you haven't been able to breath in one place for more than a few months since you graduated high school.

2.5 - years since I graduated from high school
12 - flights taken between Calfornia & Hawaiʻi
4 - flights taken between Chicago & Honolulu
1 - flight from Hawaiʻi to Italy
Time spent in Hawaiʻi: approx. 8 months
Time spent in California: approx. 20 months
Time spent in Chicago: 2 months
Scheduled stay in Italy: 4 months

Now don't get me wrong, I am TREMENDOUSLY grateful, blessed, and excited to have traveled to so many places in such a short period of time. But the reality of the matter is that I sometimes feel disoriented. Unlike many people, I didn't grow up traveling to different places for long time periods. Travel is a very recent endeavor that I chose to pursue after high school for my own personal growth.

I grew up as an ʻohā pili wale - a young taro plant that attached itself to an older corm, and her name was HAWAIʻI. There is no doubt in my mind that my heart, my home, and where I see myself growing old will always be Hawaiʻi.

However, when you mix homesickness with isolation, you often get their offspring = loneliness. And unfortunately study abroad has this mixture.

Mahalo au iā Hawaiʻi no kuʻu ola hauʻoli

On the other hand, I know it's totally possible to be alone while studying abroad and not actually feel lonely, but when it comes to being physically, culturally, and linguistically isolated, all while being in a foreign country- those bouts of loneliness tend to creep up on you without fair warning. I am not ashamed to admit that I feel lonely sometimes. It's completely normal.

Just take a deep breath...everything will be okay

There is both a Happy Ending and a Happy NOW

With all that said, lately I've been making an effort to lean more into the good relationships I have in real life. I'm keeping up with my studies, but I've also been spending time with the people on my program, exploring new things every day, watching movies with my host family, and I've been spending quality time with my new italian friends.

I have faith that there will be a happy ending to all these lonely emotions, but what I need to work on is taking advantage of happiness in the PRESENT. In spite of all the challenges right now.

I want to leave you all with a series of photos of SOME of the relationships that I cherish...primarily my family. These show not only the people I love and adore, but apparently they help me live longer!